Summoned By The East - Day Six, Boston

Day Six took us to Boston. Our flight left in the afternoon so we took the opportunity to head into downtown Boston.

There is so much history there. We took followed the red path that took us through the most prominent historical monuments. We viewed Paul Revere's home from the outside. We had thought to go in, but decided we might do it on the way back through. Well, by the time we returned to that area the place was packed and we were hungry.

We were able to see one of the original drums that was used during the battle at Bunker Hill. I know that change is imminent, but in a place like Boston, it is sad to see that so much has been lost to development all around. I imagined what it must have been like then, looking out over the harbor. Now, you cannot see the harbor from standing on Bunker Hill.

There was an AMAZING farmer's market on one of the downtown streets. I had just a tiny bit of anxiety knowing that I wouldn't be able to purchase any of it and take it home.

I'm weird that way. Here it is a month later that I have been home, and I still think I need to live on the east coast.

Reenactment of a military something....

The USS Constitution

A fish...

Summoned By The East - Day Five

Day five brought with it some more sight seeing. Brett was finished with work at noon, so I lounged around the hotel for a long time and then went to another museum to pass the time. This museum didn't allow pictures, but it was free to get into so I went. I saw muskets, and more muskets, and a LOT of Masonic items. There were also several items of clothing, bicycles, etc from older eras of US times.

Around 1pm we took Rich, Brett's co-worker from the UK to the airport. It didn't take long to get there and we still had several hours of daylight so we headed back to Salem to show Brett some of the sites there. He wanted to go to a store front that he had seen in some of my other pictures and take pictures with us in them. We walked the cemetery again, and went and saw Samantha, only this time I didn't take a picture of her.



When we were finished there, we traveled back to Concord, MA to see North Bridge, another point where the British army met up with the local Militia men. We were about 10 minutes late and the visitor's center was closed, but we were able to walk the grounds and imagine what it must have been like on that day.

Imagine, if you will, looking out your window and seeing soldiers march across your lawn. That is just what the owners of this house did. How terrifying.

I am truly fascinated by history and just wish I had a time machine so I could go back in time and witness some of these events. I'm sure there was a lot of fear and anxiety over all of this, just like we have fear and anxiety during war time today.

I have come home wanting to make more memories and have different parts of our days more special, especially dinner time. They didn't have the things we have today and all of their serving dishes served the one purpose. I love the thought of having serving dishes and nice dinner plates. I will phase those in over time around here and hopefully make dinner time a special event, rather than just dinner.

Summoned By The East - Day Four - Rain

Day three was full of non-stop drizzling, freezing rain. I spent most of the day in the hotel room watching the rain fall. I don't suppose I have ever experienced rain like it rained here. It was a little more than a sprinkle, but not a down pour. We tend to get either/or where we come from.

The view from my hotel room was no longer a beautiful skyline of trees. It was now a dark, cloudy, dreary day.

We were actually staying in Lexington, MA and the Minute Man National Park was only about a mile away from where our hotel was. I had decided that I would go there as they had a presentation about the Battle at Lexington and Concord.

Unfortunately for Brett, everything closed early so he missed all of the festivities.

When I arrived, there were 4 school buses. I couldn't believe there were that many actually with the weather that we were having. I didn't let that deter me though. I love kids and I didn't mind being around them. There were actually MANY, MANY 8th graders. I'm so glad I no longer have to be in that stage of my life, and for the first time on our trip, I was the minority.

The park ranger kept telling me that I could wait until the kids were gone to watch the video presentation. I think he was bothered more by the kids than I was. They were just normal teenagers, and like there are in all areas, some were smart mouths.

Here I am in front of a replica of North Church where the "One if by land, two if by sea" lanterns were. I took a picture of it and a man told me I needed to be in the picture so he had me stand there. What a nice guy...

Creativity of a 10-year old boy

I am amazed at Ryan's creativity. He was tasked with the assignment to write a story about a monster. I would like to share his monster, and story with the world. I have typed it exactly how he typed it. Hopefully he is taught proper grammar in the near future, but I still love it.

I kind of can't wait for Sydney to start writing stories as well. I say kind of because writing this stuff means that she is growing up, and quite frankly, I'm not even remotely ready for that!

Anyway, without further adieu, meet...

CLAWS



Everyone calls me Claws. I can see why because I have massive sharp claws. My real name is Gloobop, what kind of a monster name is that? So anyways, just call me Claws. I have seven fingers on each hand. Isn't it awesome! On my fingers are huge claws to protect myself. I have five eyes. (Two on my head three on my stomach.) My nose is like a nose on a big literally, I have a pig nose on my stomach; also I have very sharp teeth. I am '6ft.1' and 3 ft 1 in wide. I have different skin color when I am sad, mad, happy, or excited.

I smell like a garbage dump. I live in Tokyo, Japan and there is not a lot of garbage there. True my definition is different from yours. My definition is lollipops and posters of unicorns oh and Barbie's. My best hiding spot when people come around is a tar pit. You think it hurts? It feels like a hot tub to me. Nice and warm. I sleep and live in a abandoned restaurant. I always sleep under the bed of the people who used to live here. My house has posters everywhere and checkerboard floors. They have an old ice-cream machine yum.

The ice cream has mashed up bugs meat and soda cans mashed into a smooth paste. I always find the bugs for the paste in the corner because there are always spiders there. Every once and a while I hit the jackpot and find a Japanese beetle! I also eat my toe cheese every once in a while. But out of all of those foods my favorite is PICKLES!!!!!! I only get them any time my friend comes over. He is a shape shifter so I have him turn into a jar of mayonnaise grab the jar of pickles and run outside turn into a maverick (the fastest car in the world) and come over and turn into his regular monster state. I know it is complicated but it's worth it.

Some of my favorite things to do are to eat sleep and rave races with my friends. The shape shifter always turns in to me but I still always win. Every once and a while my friend steals a game station to play with us on. So that's my life.

Summoned By The East - Day Three - Plymouth, MA

Did you ever want to be at Plymouth Rock for Thanksgiving? I know as a kid, I did -- dressing up all pilgrim like, and eating good food. I'm pretty sure the best spot in the world to do that would be in Plymouth, MA, but I won't be there at Thanksgiving, so I'll have to settle for the mountains.

We were only an hour away from Plymouth. Again, I was able to get there without incident. One of the best parts of the day was when Sydney called me because she missed me. I loved that part.

I wanted to see Plymouth Rock. I pictured this amazing rock - big and anchor-like. As you can see, my imagination was FAR off on this one. Much of the rock is now underground, but it still isn't as big as I had once pictured it.



I got to see a replica of the Mayflower. I didn't spend the money to actually go inside it, but I took pictures, which were enough for me.


Here is one of the original homes built in the 1620's. I was fascinated by the S's on the sides of these buildings. I thought that maybe they meant South, however if that is what they meant, they accidentally put them on the North sides of some buildings. So, I'm not really sure what the 'S' stands for.



Check out the trunk of this tree. I couldn't stand back far enough to get a picture of the top of it, so the trunk will have to do. It just reminds me of something that has truly weathered the storms of life. I love it!



Oh, and there it is again...the H-ah-bor. Only this is Plymouth Harbor, in case you didn't know. Too bad you can't just pack this thing up and bring it back on the plane.



The cemetery here was wonderful. Very peaceful, and very sacred. There are many prominent people buried here. Prominent for the day anyway. I know I will never have a plaque such as these that mark my grave, but I realized again while standing on this hallowed ground, a lesson which has come to me before. Nothing material in this life goes with you. It just doesn't.





This view of the harbor is from Burial Hill.

Breathtaking.


Here is the first church that was built. What a magnificent building. I was constantly amazed a the enormity and craftsmanship of these buildings. These people were seeking religious freedom. How wonderful.



I loved the glass in this window. This home is a home belonged to someone who actually came over on the Mayflower. I was unable to view it because I missed the season that it is open. The home is 'leaning', and amazing that it is even still standing. It was built in the 1620's I think.


This statue is of a man by the name of Massasoit. He was a friend to the settlers

Summoned By The East - Day Two, Salem

I remember being fascinated by the story of the Salem Witch Trials when I was a kid. Never in a million years did I ever think that I might possibly be able to walk the grounds of this very interesting town.

But, as luck would have it, we were only 30 minutes away so on day two of our trip, I ventured out alone to Salem, MA.

I made it there without incident. I went straight to the Salem Witch Museum, and lucky me, I arrived two days after the main season ended for many attractions, but just in time to have a personal tour of the museum. I watched a 20-30 minute presentation of the hysteria of the days back in 1692. What a heartbreaking story. -- Girls being accused of possessing others through the devil and being hanged for it. --Men also being tried and convicted and either hanged, or pressed to death with heavy boulders.





It was said that if you could recite the Lord's prayer without mistake that you were free. A man with a noose around his neck did just that and he was accused of having Satan help him. He died anyway.

Many were put in jail for many years for the accusations. They even incarcerated a 4-year old little girl and chained her to a wall.

I loved my day in Salem. I visited the memorial created for these victims. It is a solemn reminder of what so wrongly happened to them.

I took pictures of the cemetery,


and of Samantha from Bewitched.


And then...

I took a small street and there I was...at the Salem harbor, or as they say in Salem - H-ah-bor. Seriously, I think I need to live on a boat in the harbor.

Summoned By The East

I'm going to go out on a limb here and betray the mountains that surround me, and just say that the East Coast summons my name. Really.

I had the amazing opportunity to accompany Brett on a trip to the beautiful state of Massachusetts.

He was on business.

I was on vacation.

...a much needed vacation.

We arrived on Sunday October 31st late in the evening. By the time we made it to our hotel it was after midnight, and we were both exhausted. So much so that neither of us could relax and go to sleep. We watched TV, and learned at 6am that morning that we must have been too loud for our neighbor because he started banging his dishes in his room, a sound that we wouldn't hear that early for the rest of the week. Sorry neighbor - and oh yea, just so you know, cooking bacon in your hotel room microwave is a HORRIBLE thing to do to your neighbors. I didn't think we were that bad of neighbors. We were gone all day every day, and even most of the evenings every evening.

Curse you hotel neighbor.

There. I said it.

On Monday, Brett went in to the office and I spent the day in the hotel room reading about all of the American history that I had forgotten from 5th grade. We were in the heart of the Revolutionary war country. I needed to know where I should spend my time vacationing while Brett slaved away at work :).

After work, we went to the Boston temple to take pictures. We would have gone in, but it's closed on Monday.

We had the grounds to ourselves.

Azure Skies

(You just have to be one of us to get it...)

The sun began to peek over the mountain and the sky seemed faded in the distance. All around me the colors of the season seemed to beckon my name -- They too were fading.

I entered the freeway hoping, praying. I was headed to a place where peace instills itself into one's soul. A place where the bonds of this life extend themselves into the eternities. I needed that peace today. I needed the assurance that this life really is just a test.

I am sometimes overcome by jealousy. Jealousy that some have met the requirements they are supposed to meet, and their journey is through. No more aches. No more pains. No more broken hearts from the hurtful things that are said by those who just. don't. get it. That jealousy is often rebuked when I realize that my children need me.

They need their mother.

My husband needs his wife.

As I allowed myself to be encompassed by the beautiful blue sky of today, my thoughts turned once again to my sister. She left this earth life three years ago today.

I remember everything about that day.

I spent the day reading a book. A book about a young family. A father, a mother, and a young baby. The mother died, and the book took me through the father's grief. I imagined Brian and Azure. They were just like this young family and I thought that this story would be theirs if anything ever happened to her.

I was interrupted by a phone call from Azure. She was just calling to tell me she loved me. A simple act, that I will cherish for the rest of my life. Her phone dropped the call and I had a crazy thought... "that would suck if that is the last time I talk to her." I replaced that thought with "Oh, she's just in a place where she no longer has coverage..."

Within minutes of finishing the book, I received a phone call from my mom. Azure had been in an accident. I immediately blamed myself. I was the one on the phone with her. Was I was the one that had distracted her while driving? Did someone hit her because she was talking to me? My mom told me that it was a single car accident, and that things didn't look good.
Ok, so she wasn't hit, but was it me?

I began looking for flights. The plan was that I would fly to Phoenix and ride with Ben to Flagstaff. She was being flown to Flagstaff. I pulled out a suitcase and contemplated what to pack. I was buying a one way ticket. I may be there for days, weeks. Would I have the opportunity to go to church? Was I flying to a funeral? Either way, I needed a dress. I packed a few things and we made arrangements for the kids.

My flight was leaving in 2 hours. I was running out of time.

Our trip to Salt Lake was surreal.
I had hope that I would get a phone call that told me she was going to be fine.

Deep down, I knew better.

As I entered the double doors of the Salt Lake City airport, my phone rang. It was my brother. Right then I knew. He asked me if I had heard from my parents. I had not.
He broke down and told me that she had passed away.

I couldn't stop crying. I didn't sob uncontrollably. I was in public.
However, the tears wouldn't stop.

The security guard asked me if I was ok. I told him as nicely as I could that no, my sister had just passed away. He said "I'm sorry sweetie, but at least we know she is in a better place."

I wanted to slap him.

How could she be in a better place? How could leaving a 5 1/2 month old baby be better than staying to raise him?

Tears streamed down my face as I entered what they call the "friendly skies". I spent the longest hour and a half on a plane in what we often refer to as "heaven."

Where was she? How bad did she look? What were her last moments like?





My brother picked me up from the airport. I reeked. I could smell myself. I had no control over the sweat that had decided to take up shop in my shirt. Ben kindly stopped at a store 1/2 way home and picked up a car freshener. I tease him about it, but I don't blame him. Heck, I could smell myself. I can only imagine what it was doing to him.

We stopped at the grocery store and picked up plates, and drinks, and who knows what else before we headed up the mountain.

As we entered Azure's house, we were greeted by family. People were everywhere. I went into the restroom and I lost it. The sobbing had come, and it was there to stay for a brief moment. I allowed it to just take over. I was in her home for the first time and she wasn't there to show me. She had been so proud of her new house, and she wasn't even the one that was able to show me.

As I go back over those events today, I am thankful for the name my parents chose for her. Azure.

A beautiful blue.

A color of the sky.

She is in those skies. Those Azure skies.


(Brett snapped this photo the day after her funeral. It pulls at my heart.)

Birthday Surprise

* a note from me: I hate surprises. HATE them. I don't think anything causes more anxiety for me than a surprise. It's the fear of the unknown, and I hate the unknown.

Brett decided that he needed to surprise me for my birthday and take me away to the Snowbird ski resort for the weekend.


It was hard for me to go because I knew that my family would be honoring the life of Desmon, and I wasn't going to be there. On the flip side though, it was wonderful to be able to get away without having to worry about the kids and to just relax. We attempted to sleep in, but we were both awake by 7:00 am. Oh well, we tried.

Ahh, the memories...

The View from our room

In the Mountain Tunnel

(There is a tunnel that goes completely through the mountain. It was amazing)

Climbing the rock wall. I hated it.

The Ropes Course

View from the ski lift


On my way to the Alpine Slide


The beautiful vote from 11,000 feet
Stunning


Thanks Brett!

September Rain

I have always loved the turn of seasons. It doesn't matter what season it is, I love the change in the weather pattern. Different temperatures are somehow magical.

This year however, the joy of the changing season has been overshadowed by all of the events that have filled my days. From service to sickness, to the death of an angel, September has been full of rain.

I was asked today what I have done this month. It is all a blur. In an effort to not be completely negative, here are the highlights.

- September 5th - Made a mad dash trip to AZ, and returned on September 7th. We didn't get any of the pictures we went down there for, but here are a few that we did get.

(Taya, smile for Aunt Deni)

- September 8th - Arrived at Camp Maple Dell to set up for a Wood Badge training (BSA Adult training)
- September 11th - Came home for the weekend sick as a dog so I spent the next few days in bed.
- September 15th - Arrived back at Camp Maple Dell feeling better, but still not 100%
- September 18th - Came home at the end of the Wood Badge training, and slept - still didn't feel well.
- September 20th - Desmon went to heaven - we will miss her!


- September 24th - I went to lunch with Martha, and Brett surprised my by taking me to Snowbird Ski resort. (More on that to follow)

- September 27th - Did my visiting teaching

- September 28th - Celebrated my 33rd birthday by doing yard work with Brett, laying sod in a neighbor's yard, and watching a comedy show. It was a good day.

Welcome October, I'm sick of the rain.

A Heavy Heart

Today my heart is heavy.

My thoughts have overwhelmed me for quite some time now. So much has been going on around here that there are times I wonder when the point of breakdown will surface. I have been heartbroken. I have felt betrayed. I have wondered if the service that my husband and I render to others will ever be appreciated by some.

Life is interesting with all of its adventures and trials. I crave the companionship of laughter at every turn, for laughter is what rises me above the darkness.

For the past two weeks I have spent most of my time at as a staff member of a Wood Badge course. I had spent a lot of time preparing for this course and the first day into it I came down with a horrible sore throat that turned itself into a horrible cold. I was given a priesthood blessing by our course director, and I was grateful for the faith of the members that were present.

I witnessed miracles as I was able to preform my duties, only to have my body give out at the end of the day when there was nothing else expected of me.

I have met people who have touched my life, and I have been reminded why scouting is a movement that is needed in the world today. We all need young men who pledge their honor to do their duty to God.

When I was gone from my family, my thoughts often turned to my children. I wondered what they would do if I didn't return home to them. Had I told them I loved them enough? Had I taught them enough of Jesus Christ? Did they know that the greatest things in life aren't things? I went over and over in my mind the details of their faces. The softness of their skin. The looks on their faces as I hugged them one last time before getting in the car to drive back up the mountain. As a mother, was I doing enough?

I am home now and the gratitude I have for my husband fills my heavy heart and lightens my load. I have spent the past several hours in bed. My body has given out and I am resting to rid myself of these ailments. Brett is still carrying the load of the house work...dinner, dishes, laundry, getting kids off to church. I am grateful for him. I need him in my life.

I am also grateful for the chance to have a heavy heart from time to time. These feelings have turned me to the words of past prophets. Omni, a prophet in the Book of Mormon gave me an invitation that I have readily accepted. He said "And now, my beloved brethren, I would that ye should come unto Christ, who is the Holy One of Israel , and partake of his salvation, and the power of his redemption. Yea, come unto him and offer your whole souls as an offering unto him, and continue in fasting and praying and endure to the end; and as the Lord liveth ye will be saved."

Ultimately, it is Christ who, having suffered all, can lift me from my own suffering. It is He to whom I owe my gratitude the most.