It is pouring at BERGER HOUSE tonight.
Ryan came home from school and said he had a bad day. One boy kneed him in the crotch, another kid took his backpack and threw it in the garbage, and yet another one went through his desk and took what he pleased only to taunt Ryan with it later.
I spent a large portion of the afternoon pondering how I could handle the situation at school. Brett suggested I call one of the mothers. This isn't the first time we've struggled with one of the boys. The bullying has actually gone on for over a year now. I couldn't bring myself to call her.
Turns out I didn't have to call her. She actually called me. Apparently her son told her husband that he kneed Ryan today. So she called to see if we have been struggling with her son. I told her yes and told her what had happened. It almost seems like a daily occurrence, and we are trying to teach Ryan to turn the other cheek. Unfortunately his cheeks are getting calloused and his heart is breaking.
After bedtime, I got another call from the mother. She told me that this is a two way street and that Ryan has been throwing rocks at her son, and calling him names and trying daily to get him in trouble. All of which, Ryan denies.
I know my kids aren't perfect. However, I know Ryan's behavior fairly well, and some of the things he was accused of tonight are out of character for him.
Tomorrow he will have to face this kid, as he does every other day.
And tonight, He cried himself to sleep.
Hopefully soon he will catch one of life's little breaks.
I spent a large portion of the afternoon pondering how I could handle the situation at school. Brett suggested I call one of the mothers. This isn't the first time we've struggled with one of the boys. The bullying has actually gone on for over a year now. I couldn't bring myself to call her.
Turns out I didn't have to call her. She actually called me. Apparently her son told her husband that he kneed Ryan today. So she called to see if we have been struggling with her son. I told her yes and told her what had happened. It almost seems like a daily occurrence, and we are trying to teach Ryan to turn the other cheek. Unfortunately his cheeks are getting calloused and his heart is breaking.
After bedtime, I got another call from the mother. She told me that this is a two way street and that Ryan has been throwing rocks at her son, and calling him names and trying daily to get him in trouble. All of which, Ryan denies.
I know my kids aren't perfect. However, I know Ryan's behavior fairly well, and some of the things he was accused of tonight are out of character for him.
Tomorrow he will have to face this kid, as he does every other day.
And tonight, He cried himself to sleep.
Hopefully soon he will catch one of life's little breaks.
I hate that part of life...why do kids have to be SOOOO mean? he will get through it just fine because he has amazing parents!!!
ReplyDeleteOh that makes me want to cry!! I am so sorry he is going through that!
ReplyDeleteSadly, hurt people hurt people. The bullies must have miserable lives. I'm so sorry. That's why, even tho girls tend to whine more than boys, girls are easier to raise because boys are always having to prove themselves to other boys. It hurts my heart. Ryan is such an extraordinary individual!
ReplyDeleteOh, Deni...how I wish I could remove that part of life. Whether I wear rose colored glasses or not, I have a really hard time believing that Ryan is treating ANYONE in that manner. You and Brett are wonderful parents and Ryan is one of the most tender, considerate children I know. Please let him know how very much I love him. We will pray for yet another child to soften his heart and find another way to find his manhood. If they only knew how SMALL they look being a BIG bully.
ReplyDeleteThis makes my blood boil. I thought I had posted while I was in Calif last week, but apparently it did not take. Kicking in the crotch is a very serious assault. It needs to be called an assault when you talk about it. Taking things from a desk is unacceptable....I assume this mother is so very stupid that she sees Ryan taking on all three kids with his words and rocks. My guess is that she knows this kid is a problem and covers for him making it worse. I also bet that the school has had problems with these boys before. They did not pick on him because they perceive him to be the biggest, strongest kid in the school, nor the most accurate rock thrower. They picked on him because they believed that they could do it and get away with it. This is a national problems and there are laws in some areas. Maybe yours is one. Certainly your school system has a policy for dealing with bullying. If I were you I would go, mother and father, to the principal and tell him or her that you have an expectation that your child be safe in school. If not in school then where? I would question the supervision of the teacher that would allow kids stealing from other's desk. I would want to know what the principal plans to do about it. If it happened on the way home, the school still has the responsibility to punish. Obviously they cannot walk every kid home, but they can deal with problems. Now, I am serious about this...if she chooses not to do anything I would go to the Superintendent...always both of you or Brett. We may not like it but men carry more clout. I would in the strongest and firmist and most confident language tell him or her the same thing. We are waaayyy past the boys will be boys era.
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